Friday, April 22, 2005

Search Request Weeky, Pt. 2

See? I wasn't kidding about there being a lot of them!

  • moody blues extraterrestrials: Well, they've already admitted to being time travelers.

  • "steer the situation" romance: Why do I suddenly have the image of Homer Simpson trying to teach Grampa how to score with women? "So if I take your advice and make your patented move, then my chances for love will slightly improve!"

  • jimmy buffett insulated coffee mug: Somehow, a margarita glass would seem more appropriate.

  • Show Me Maximum Boobage Pictures: No. But you get points for using the word "boobage."

  • labor inducing milkshake: Wow, I hope they don't sell that at the Tastee Freez!

  • cliff notes for judy blume tiger eyes: Sigh. You know we're living in an illiterate society when people want cliff notes for Judy Blume novels.

  • bulleted causes of the war of 1812: Did they have bullets by then, or was it still musket balls? Sorry, sorry... That was bad, even for me.

  • sex verbosity: What, you mean, like, "Ooh baby, harder?"

  • diy rotating spinner bar: I have no idea what that is, but it sounds like a fun thing to have.

  • stick figures shoot multiple weapons: Yeah, you gotta watch out for those stick figures. They're real violent types.

  • Titanic Simpsons fanfic: Because there's nothing The Simpsons won't cross over with.

  • "duck porn": What a fowl idea. (Sorry!)

  • banik cover dvd: There was one on the cover of one of the Farscape DVDs. I think he had his "I've just been vomited on my a muppet!" expression on.

  • bunioned beauty: Well, I'm one of those two things.

  • battlestar galactica nude: Hey, there's nowhere the poor ship's going to be able to go for a nice coat of paint now.

  • tickling feet on t.v.: Judging by how many search requests I get involving some variation on the word "tickle," I'd say there's an audience for a Tickling Channel.

  • T'Pol -toons gallery: Aw, but I bet T'Pol would be cute as a toon.

  • Farscape Quotes Peacekeeper Wars Stark: My favorite? John: "Convince them it's not our fault!" Stark: "It's not our fault! It's not our fault!"

  • tolkien thesis sentence: You're never going to get your Tolkien paper written this way.

  • sexy daughter OR wife OR mom OR sister OR aunt "see pictures of my": You forgot "niece" and "grandmother."

  • Delvian Goddess: Anybody have any idea how to actually spell her name?

  • betty boob tattoos: Hey, nobody's coming near my boobs with a needle!

  • here's my boobs: Put those away!

  • 21st birthday nude party pictures: I hope it was a summer birthday.

  • Lego/organization structure: Why do I have this image of the Lego company's organizational chart being printed on little interlocking bricks?

  • "the grapes of wrath" steinbeck tinkerbell: Ah, yes, the little-known excised "Tinkerbell" scenes were wisely cut from the novel.

  • ned flanders in the shower naked: Well, hey, on the list of Simpsons characters it would least scar me to see naked, he's actually pretty near the top.

  • calvin hobbes "don't blame me" dog: How could anyone blame innocent little Calvin for anything? Including whatever he did to the dog.

  • marvin the martian area 51 t-shirt: I have never seen this, but I want one.

  • "Doctor Who" nude: Alas, the only Doctor we got to see nude (tastefully and partially, of course) was Pertwee. This strikes me as entirely unfair.

  • malcolm and reed enterprise funny stuff: I'd probably find Malcolm and Reed funny if Enterprise in general hadn't pretty much put me to sleep.

  • "what if the lord" of rings written andrews: What Andrews? Julie Andrews? That could be interesting, I guess.

  • Kent McCord nude: Oh, I'd dearly like to add that to my collection of nude farscape search requests, because I haven't gotten any guest characters at all, but, alas, if it's the actor rather than the character, it doesn't count. Anybody want to see Jack Crichton nude? Hmm?

  • "t'pol" naked and on breast: You should talk to that boob tattoo artist if you want her naked on your breast.

  • t'pol spock's grandmother: Oh, for gods' sakes, please tell me it isn't so!

  • "marvin martian" "fanfiction": Hey, I can think of some interesting crossover possibilities...

  • "most endangered species": It's man! Oh, wait, sorry. That's "the most dangerous game."

  • cooter cleavage: I don't know what that means, but, damn it's fun to say!

  • joss feet pics: Is there something particularly interesting about Joss's feet? Does he have freaky mutant feet? 'Cause that would be interesting.

  • "never tell the same lie twice" garak: Ah, good old Garak. Thanks to him, I will never look at the story of the Boy Who Cried Wolf the same way again.

  • eccleston SEXY: Eh, I suppose, but I still prefer McGann. Mmmm, McGann...

  • braca love fanfiction: There's no love like Braca love!

  • sims nude patch does not work: So your poor sims have to go around fully clothed? How horrible!

  • ophiucus personality traits: Ophiuchus is composed of many distant but hot-headed individuals...

  • technobabble rpg chart: I was briefly in a Star Trek game where the GM made up one of those. You got bonuses to your engineering rolls if you used words like "quantum."

  • Geraint Wyn Davies asshole: I wonder if that's a comment on his personality, or an expression of interest in a portion of his anatomy? On second thought, I don't want to know.

  • contacting Leonard Cohen by snail mail: Uh... Try his record label.

  • unconscious self-inflicted pain: I was going to say that it's kind of hard to inflict pain on yourself when you're unconscious, but then I thought of a few interesting things I'd somehow managed to do in my sleep, so never mind.

  • Sentimental Boobs: Well, that gives new meaning to the words "family heirloom."

  • farscape moya's ride song lyrics: The only thing I can think of that this might possibly refer to is Rygel's cute little drunken song about how Dominars don't travel in reverse. I love Rygel.

  • "computer speakers" making crackling noises: Mine were doing that, but they seem to have stopped. Thus proving that sometimes if you ignore problems they do go away.

  • "sexy thing" ascii art: Maybe I just lack the proper art-appreciation abilities, but I honestly can't imagine finding anything done in ascii sexy.

  • stark farscape quote vast: Oh, how sad is it that I know exactly which quote they were looking for?

  • "High Council of Time Lords": I think they're in a meeting. Knowing them, a very long and boring meeting.

  • My day today? Nothing major, just Xenon base gone, Scorpio gone: Oh, Avon, quite whining!

  • trouble copying blake's 7 dvd: Well, I don't think they want you to copy it.
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