Saturday, April 30, 2005

Search Request Weekly

Here we are: the latest batch of weird, wacky and interesting search requests that have brought poor misguided souls to this blog.

  • transmetropolitan slash fanfiction: The possibilities frighten me.

  • julius ceaser personality type: Um... I'm gonna go with "dominant and self-motivated."

  • facts "Alkalai swamp" -hotel -tour: Interestingly, I am apparently the only Google result for this. Guess most people just aren't interested in that swamp unless they can get a hotel and a tour.

  • real person fanfic geddy lee: I am simultaneously repulsed and fascinated. I thought you only got that sort of thing with annoying boy bands.

  • nomad zen xtra crack: Oh, man, I had weird thoughts involving that crazy space probe from the original Star Trek, the ship's computer on Blake's 7, and hardcore drugs, before I realized that this was probably just talking about a damaged mp3 player.

  • new dalek spoilers +sink plunger: I always thought of it more as a toilet plunger. Hmm. There's probably a joke to be made there involving the words "exterminate" and "excrete" or something, but I'm not gonna go looking for it.

  • nude hiker's day: 7:30 AM: Woke up. Got tiny burns in sensitive places from sparks from cooking fire. 9:00 AM: Started out on the day's hike. Got scratches in sensitive places from unfortunate encounter with thorny branches. 12:30 PM: Noticed I was developing sunburn in sensitive places. 2:00 PM: Really unfortunate encounter with poison oak...

  • "alan rickman" +copius: Copious? Is he? How... interesting.

  • tranquilizer spandex story teen: Must be an interesting story!

  • embarrassing porn bloopers: Are people who act in porn movies even capable of embarrassment?

  • vote beeblebrox video download: Hey, he's got my vote, even without seeing his political commercials!

  • "paul goddard" keyboard: Does he have a special keyboard?

  • warning your employees about a "dangerous customer": Geez, where do you work?!

  • bath book muppet waterproof: Hey, I want a waterproof book about muppets to read in the bath! Preferably Farscape muppets.

  • nude male captains: How can you tell what their rank is if they're nude?

  • eccleston love: He wasn't really getting much of that for a while, what with being a great big quitter and all.

  • "drinking game" hornblower: Every time you see the ocean, take a drink...

  • magician's assistant +ticklish feet: So it's not enough that she gets sawed in half, but she gets her poor detached feet tickled, too?

  • a fish in Japan my half-sister goth: Your half-sister's a goth Japanese fish? What?

  • download free songs Tamara ooh ah: Ooh, ah! Tamara's gonna get in trouble with the RIAA!

  • internet tonight nude klingons: Thanks. I was wondering what was on the internet tonight.

  • quality of life, life satisfaction: Well, aren't we all looking for those?
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