Almost None of This Is True.


You are instant coffee gulped on a bus.

You are better than nothing. You are well-meaning,
but ersatz. You sing along with Muzak in
elevators. You cannot remember your original
hair color, and your artificial nails could be
used to slice a zucchini. You forget small
details such as your telephone number and the
names of your children. You believe in
astrology, numerology, and satinism (the cult
of shiny fabrics).


What kind of coffee are you?
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