Hypothetical Questions Don't Come Much More Hypothetical Than This.

Somebody forwarded this list of rather thought-provoking questions to a mailing list I'm on (under the heading "What Do You Really Value"?). I thought it might be interesting to try answering them, so here goes...

1) If an all-powerful alien offered you the chance to live forever (young and healthy, barring being run over by cars or plane crashes) BUT you could never have children, would you accept the offer? (Assume you hadn't yet had children.)
-Yes
-No

Oh, hell yeah. That's a complete no-brainer. I wasn't planning on having kids, anyway.

2) You have been found guilty of some terrible crime and sentenced to lose one of your senses forever. Do you give up:
-Your eyesight?
-Your hearing?
-Your sense of smell/taste?
-Your sense of touch?

Now, this one's a lot tougher. I guess I'd have to go with smell/taste, because, while that would really suck, it'd be the least incapacitating loss.

3) An elderly, eccentric zillionaire wants to adopt you, and will make you his sole heir IF you will agree to never communicate again by any means (visits, phone calls, letters, email) with any member of your real family. Do you accept his offer?
-Yes
-No

Somebody on the mailing list answered this with "I'd tell him to fuck off." I can do no better than to echo that.

4) Your fairy godmother, who somehow missed attending your birth, has belatedly shown up. To atone, she offers you your choice of the following gifts. Which do you pick?
-Intelligence increased by 30 points
-Appearance enhanced to qualify for the 10 Most Beautiful Men/Women in the World
-Body enhanced to make you among the strongest/fittest/healthiest people on earth
-Great talent in your choice of artistic field
-A trust fund paying you a million dollars a year

The advanced IQ is mildly tempting, but I'm not really doing all that much with the IQ I've got now. Fitness/healthiess is also slightly tempting, but with my lifestyle, it'd hardly last. Nah, I'm gonna have to take the money. I think I'd rather alter my circumstances than myself, anyway.

5) Having won the Magical Lottery, you are to be given one of these supernatural power. Which do you want?
-The power to read minds
-The power to heal others with a touch
-The power to predict the future
-The power to become invisible
-The power to teleport yourself anywhere instantly

Aw, now this one's really unfair. I want the teleport power. I love going places, but loathe car trips and plane rides. And air travel is too damned expensive. But I'd feel morally compelled to pick the healing power. And then I'd feel morally compelled to spend as much time as possible using it. Which would probably involve a lot of travelling. Damn.

6) You have been found guilty of a horrendous crime. There is no chance you will ever be set free again. You will not be allowed visitors or contact with the outside world ever again. Under the circumstances, would you prefer:
-Lifetime solitary confinement
-Painless execution

As long as they leave me a lifetime's supply of reading material, I'll take the solitary confinment.

7) Another all-powerful alien offers you a choice: would you trade away the last twenty years of your life in exchange for being made physically ten years younger now? That is, suppose you are now 35 and would normally live to be 85. Would you choose instead instead to have your physical body reset to the condition you were in at age 20 BUT know you would then die at age 65 (at which point you would physically 'be' 55)?
-Yes, I would take the deal
-No, I'll stick with a normal life

Normal life, definitely. Why would I want to exchange twenty years for ten? I wasn't that much better off, physically, at 21 than I am at 31.

8) Would you rather have the talent/ability to:
-Paint masterpieces
-Invent new machines/devices
-Write great poetry
-Discover scientific breakthroughs
-Compose glorious music
-Write great novels
-Give Oscar quality acting performances
-Play an instrument at concert soloist skill
-Sing more beautifully than anyone else alive

Um. This one's a toughie. Inventing new machines would be kind of cool, but that would have to involve a major change to the way my brain works, given my utter mechanical ineptitude. And that's kind of a scary thought, so no. There was a time when my fondest desire was to discover scientific breakthroughs, but as interested as I've always been in science, I realized some time ago that, as a career, it's not really for me (except of course in the peripheral way that I'm currently involved in it). I think maybe I'll go for the novels. I actually enjoy writing.

9) You are going to be stricken with an incurable disease. Would you rather it be
-One that has no symptoms, except you drop dead in ten years
-One that causes constant, moderate pain but doesn't disable you or shorten your life.
-One that disables you in some major way, but causes no pain and doesn't shorten your life.
-One that causes no pain, disability, or death, BUT makes other people reluctant to be around you

Ick! Talk about a horrible choice! None of the above, please! Oh, OK, if I have to pick one, I think I'd go with the one that makes other people reluctant to be around me. I guess that'd be like a horrible deformity or overwhelming body odor or something? Doesn't sound like fun, but, hey, anything that doesn't involve pain, disability, or death is head and shoulders above the other options. Besides, anybody who'd refuse to be around me because of my horrible deforming body odor (or whatever it is) probably isn't anybody I really need in my life, anyway.

10) Yet another alien pops by and informs you that you have been chosen to be Mr. (Ms.) Power of Life and Death. Each day you can "shift" one death from the person who is "scheduled" to die to any other person you feel more deserves death. The people you can choose to spare are innocent young children who will die from diseases or in accidents. Which kind of people do you select to die instead?
-People "famous" for having done awful things that aren't being dealt with by the legal system, such as dictators who have fled their countries or unknown terrorist bombers
-People you have personal cause to hate
-Hopelessly insane people
-People in jail for terrible crimes
-People so senile they don't know who they are
-People in comas who aren't expected to recover
-Drug dealers
-Nobody -- I'd refuse to act and let the child die as scheduled

Yikes! I don't want that kind of power. I don't think those sorts of decisions should be mine to make, and I'm quite sure I couldn't handle the responsibility. If I was forced to take it, I'd probably do nothing. But I'd doubtless feel terribly guilty about that, too. Hmm, maybe if I threatened to make the alien my first victim, he'd reconsider making me take it, and I could walk away with something vaguely resembling a clear conscience...