Sunday, May 23, 2010

I KILL YOU LIKE KEAMY!

Dear local ABC affiliate,

I am trying to watch the beginning of the final episode of Lost. You know, the big, important, landmark-event show that you have been hyping like crazy? It appears to start out with a rather lovely series of images. I say "appears to," because it is difficult to make them out. You see, I do not have an extremely large television, and you have seen fit to shrink the show into a tiny little box so that you can show me pictures of a fire. Now, a fire is certainly important news, and I do not begrudge the text you have scrolling at the bottom of the screen, distracting as it is, because it contains an important public service announcement. BUT I DO NOT NEED TO SEE THE PICTURES! I KNOW WHAT SMOKE LOOKS LIKE, AND THE ONLY SMOKE I WANT TO SEE RIGHT NOW IS THE SMOKE MONSTER!

AAARGH! I BURN YOU IN A FIRE NOW! BURN! BURN! BURN YOU ALL!

Ahem.

Much lack of love,
Me

[ETA: OK, they eventually stopped doing it. Mostly. And the finale was... interesting. I'm not at all sure how I feel about some of it, but I did enjoy watching it, despite the station's best efforts.]

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