Sunday, February 22, 2009


I had the cats into the vet for their regular annual checkup last week, and it appears that Lard-Ass Kitty has lost no weight since I put him on the diet. None. Sigh.

So, in an attempt to supply him with some kind of exercise regimen, I went out and bought a little laser pointer so he could have a nice dot of light to chase around while I sit comfortably in my chair and move nothing but my arm.

It does seem to work reasonably well. He won't always jump up and chase after the thing, although he does always look keenly interested, but when he does, he moves with an insane energy you'd never expect in an animal that obese.

But I dunno. I actually feel weirdly guilty playing this game. Because it's a terrible tease, isn't it? The very laws of physics dictate that no matter how diligently the cats chase down the little light spot, they are never, ever going to have anything to show for it. It's like some kind of cruel kitty mind-fuck, really.

But, man, it is entertaining to aim the light right between their paws and then suddenly turn it off and watch their little "WTF? Where'd it go?!" faces.


  1. "...they are never, ever going to have anything to show for it."

    Oh, I wouldn't feel too bad, if I were you. Sure the cats will never have anything concrete to show for all the hours of spot chasing they do, but humans don't really have a whole lot to show for all of the hours of TV we watch. It's all about providing an entertaining diversion. At least the cats get some exercise out of it.

  2. It did occur to me after I wrote this that a relevant analogy could be drawn up with humans and video games.

    Then again, theoretically, at least, humans understand the difference between reality and video games, and I'm not sure cats do. :)

  3. I'm not sure all humans do, either.