Musical Fortunetelling, Revisited

I did a variation on this meme a while back, but I think this version has more questions, and, heck, it's fun enough to do twice. For those of you who missed it the first time, you cue up iTunes,or whatever other music-playing system you have, set it on random shuffle, and let the resultant playlist answer all your most important questions.

(Um, you don't need to be a "hardhat atheist" to know that this is entirely for amusement value and doesn't actually reveal any Profound Secrets, right?)

So I fired up my trusty Rio Karma, which contains my entire music collection and then some, and received the following, er, interesting results.

Question: What do you think of me, iTunes Karma?

Answer: "Story of Isaac" (Susan Vega, covering Leonard Cohen)

Um... I have no idea what that means, but I find it disturbing.

Question: Will I have a happy life?

Answer: "A Winter Snowscape" (Jethro Tull)

Hmm. Winter's not usually associated with happiness...

Question: What do my friends really think of me?

Answer: "This Town in the Rain" (Anthony Stewart Head)

They think I'm annoying and wet?

Question: Do people secretly lust after me?

Answer: "Play It All Night Long" (Warren Zevon)

Translation: Yes, but it a really creepy and disgusting way.

Question: What should I do with my life?

Answer: "Dawn's Lament" (Michelle Trachtenberg)

I should angst in annoying teenage fashion about how nobody notices me?

Question: Why must life be so full of pain?

Answer: "Peter Parker" (The Great Luke Ski)

It's all the fault of those damned radioactive spiders!

Question: How can I maximize my pleasure during sex?

Answer: "Quietly Making Noise" (Jimmy Buffett)

Well, that's pretty clear, at least.

Question: Will I ever have children?

Answer: "Wherever You Will Go" (The Calling)

I'll have kids following me everywhere? Aargh!

Question: Will I die happy?

Answer: "Songs from the Wood" (Jethro Tull)

That seems like a pretty unambiguous "yes." I'll not only die happy, I'll die feeling much better than I could know!

Question: Can you give me some advice?

Answer: "Available Light" (Rush).

I should buy light bulbs, maybe?

Question: What do you think happiness is?

Answer: Scherzo, Episode 1, Part 1 (Big Finish Productions)

Happiness is Doctor Who! Well, I kind of knew that already.

Question: What's my favorite fetish?

Answer: "'Ya-Hoo' Main Title" (The Simpsons)

Oh, yeah, that Yodelin' Zeke totally does it for me.

Question: Am I a complete freak?

Answer: "Living in the Past" (Jethro Tull)

Yes, I am a Jethro Tull-loving freak who is stuck in the past.