Wednesday, August 08, 2012

Currently, In August

Current clothes: Farscape t-shirt. Khaki shorts. Black socks.

Current mood: A little brain-tired, maybe even a little headachy. I think I've been spending too much time lately sitting in front of the computer having e-mail conversations on emotionally and politically touchy subjects. It's a good thing to do, especially when it gets you out of the kind of echo chamber so many of us spend our time in these days, but it's kind of draining.

Current music: Just more random-shuffle stuff recently. I think I remember some novelty songs and some Billy Joel and something Celtic.

Current annoyance: My own imperfections, and those of the rest of the world. Stupid real life.

Current thing: Sucking down episodes of Fullmetal Alchemist as fast as Netflix can possibly get them to me, and then pouting when they run out. I don't know what it is lately. When it comes to TV and DVDs, I seem to be falling like crazy for the most improbable stuff.

Current desktop picture: Still the Grand Canyon in moonlight. I really ought to change that soon.

Current book: White Queen by Gwyneth Jones. Which I really need to get back to. I confess, I'm having trouble motivating myself to finish it.

Current song in head: Um, it's in Japanese. And, since I don't speak Japanese, it's not so much the actual song, but a tune with vague. Japanese-like sounds attached to it.

Current DVD in player: There is no Fullmetal Alchemist in my DVD player, because as soon as I finish one of those discs it goes right back in the mail so they can OMG send more right now please! Currently in the other player, though, is disc 3 of season 2 of The Twilight Zone. The episode quality at this point is a little uneven, but at its best, holy crap, it does not get more classic than classic TZ.

Current refreshment: A nice cup of tea.

Current worry: I am attempting to banish worry! Or at least to put it in its place. Honestly, I've just been having way too much free-floating stress and anxiety lately, to the point where it was beginning to -- ha! -- worry me. And the other day, I found a piece of advice online for dealing with this sort of thing: have a designated time to worry, say ten minutes a day, and maybe use it to write your worries down. I'd actually seen that advice before and it seemed rather stupid to me, but holy cow, as soon as I thought maybe I'd try it, the difference was immediate. See, some stupid, stupid part of my brain appears to be convinced that if I don't worry about my health, about the problems of people I care about, about world affairs, about my social relationships, and about whether I'm being as good a person as I want to be, well, that means that I'm not giving these important topics their due. And so I am forced to indulge them, over and over. But apparently if I reassure that part of my brain that its concerns will be given due consideration at the appointed time, hey, it figures can wait, and I can quit stewing and get on with my life. It's like magic! I really, really hope this keeps working.

Current thought: Of course, that means I have to actually follow through with Designated Worry Time. I think my brain is a little too clever to be taken in by false promises. Sigh. Well, maybe I'll go get it over with now. Off to fret!

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